Wake Me Up, I'm Dreaming

  So with that, basically our holiday is over. We left Kho Phi Phi this morning on a "long tail" boat, then hopped onto the ferry after a lively discussion about what makes a shake different from a smoothie (I think it has something to do with the fruit/dairy content) and what is the difference between a smoothie and a leesie (which is the same thing as a Thai smoothie. Maybe). After a kind of weird intermittently interrupted nap on the gentle waves of the sea in the Bay of Thailand, we arrived in Krabi, were shuttled to the airport by some young-ish, misogynistic van drivers, whom I'm pretty sure yelled out the window of the van that the three (tiny) young adult women on a scooter were going too slow because they were too fat. Which is possibly the regional fashion of how to pick up ladies, or more likely, they were assholes. But then again, who isn't at age 19/20/21-45?

  We're now flying back to Bangkok to basically run a couple errands, have a couple more cultural experiences (if you go to Bangkok, you'd probably kick yourself a little for not at least walking through the Pat Pong (red light district), since if you ask anyone who knows next to nothing about Thailand, their first response is something along the lines of "Thailand? That's like China, eh?," and "a lot of hookers, right?"¹ So it's apparently a sight to behold. Then it's the long flight(s) home, which I'll probably spend staving off sleep, because I have had some crazy ass/disturbing/vivid dreams this entire month.

   I very rarely remember my dreams when I'm sleeping in my own bed, and so the ones that do manage to trickle through my superego filter I usually take somewhat seriously and I tend to carry them around for a few days afterwards, mulling over the significance and trying to decipher any deeper meaning that can be found in the imagery or emotional content. This month has given me WAY too many dreams to delve too seriously into any of them, but I'll give you a quick survey.

1.My friend Lyndon, who is rather thrifty, and eats a lot of taco salad, decided that in his quest to put on a few pounds, would begin eating at McDonald's more often, which he kicked off with a 5 visit day, each time getting at least 2 cheeseburgers. Dream Lyndon is much less healthy and far more impulsive with his diet than real Lyndon - real life implications? Probably none other than I think Lyndon probably eats rather healthily, and an all McD's diet isn't a great idea.

2. I was in an old factory in the Exchange district of Winnipeg with a few friends, tearing out old pipes and ducting for salvage when the entire building began to crumble. After nearly expiring, I manage to escape in a fairly epic and adrenaline pumping fashion - real life implications? I think it might have something to do with my thoughts about Canada Post eventually crumbling under the pressure of technological advancement, and what I want to pursue in terms of career in the future.

3. This supremely screwed up dream I had about playing a show at The Zoo in Osborne Village, although it definitely wasn't The Zoo (it was actually in the basement, sort of. There was a lot of dysfunctional dream logic taking effect in this one, spatial orientation was right out the window), in which I came across a really grubby naked transvestite in my quest for the bathroom, followed by looking at myself in the mirror and feeling (quite vividly, and terrifyingly) someone's long nailed hands scraping at the back of my legs. When I turned around, there was some ghoulish figure sitting in the bathtub behind the clear, mildew-ridden shower curtain with long, wet hair covering their face. I took matters into my own hands and tried to throttle them, at which point I woke up with a start, a racing pulse, and an inability to fall back asleep for at least an hour. I think this one had to do with all the Ladyboy spotting I had been doing, and maybe everyone needs a good nightmare once in a while to scare the shit out of them?

4. I had a dream that we had left Thailand a few days early, and I was very frustrated by the fact that we had forgotten to do all the things we needed to do in Bangkok before we left. A lot of this dream took place in my high school and on the bus back to Steep Rock, a bus that was being driven by my deceased bus driver, whom I confronted about his being dead. I guess his answer was convincing enough, because I remember thinking that it was a reasonable enough answer and returning to my seat. The strangest part of this dream is that I was pretty sure I was dreaming the whole time, and that we were probably still in Ao Nang, but I wasn't able to wake myself up for at least an hour. Perhaps this was along the lines of dreaming that I had slept through my alarm the night before the exam, only to wake up at 4 and feel like I had been shit-kicked throughout the entire exam. The frustration of not being able to awaken from my dream was this bizarre palpable feeling that I was entirely aware of during the dream, but at the same time I didn't have any crazy lucid dreaming experience, as I definitely would have used my dream Superman powers to fly around and do some wild stuff.

5. I had a couple other weird ones about Folk Fest being right around the corner and my Birkenstocks getting wet (which has been on my mind way too much this trip - "Birks, they're the greatest sandals in the world, just don't get em' wet, because if you do, it's a pain in the ass." But besides those 4 the others are pretty much just dream rubbish that doesn't really make any sense. I'm looking forward to getting back to my own bed/pillow, where the only thing that wakes me up in the middle of the night is an overwhelming need to pee, or when the dog is having a nightmare/has decided that 4 AM is good time to lick her nose about 87 times in a row.



¹There is, in the defence of the ignorant, a lot of prostitution in various forms in Thailand. For example, I'm pretty sure that the white dude in his late forties with a fairly monumental beer gut has a monetarily based relationship with the beautiful late 20s/early 30s Thai girl beside him.